It drives like nothing else. There's the xDrive four-wheel-drive system nicked off the X5 with a new acronym called Dynamic Performance Control (DPC) that can monitor and adapt more systems than the human brain. You can throw this car into a corner at ludicrous speed, in standing water an inch thick, and not crash. In the dry, it'll embarrass a very, very fast car. Given that it sits about a foot higher than any other coupe shape, you don't tend to fear potholes or speed bumps. In fact, you fear very little - this thing feels really tough. The steering's good, the ride's firm but manageable (even on the optional 20s with 335mm rears), the new 4.4-litre biturbo in the 5.0i an absolute joy. There's plenty of power (407bhp) but more usefully a great big standing wodge of torque (442lb ft) in a large proportion of the rev-range, and that grunt works superbly well with the X5's six-speed auto. There's just one problem with this four-seat coupe hatch thing - or 'Sports Activity Vehicle' as BMW puts it. It's really quite ugly. I like odd stuff. Big fan of random Citroens, always liked the clever, or the bizarre. There's just something about genuinely interesting cars in mass production that tickles my fancy. But even I'm struggling a bit with the X6. I like the idea of a kind of urban attack vehicle, something chunky but road-biased and quick, a kind of Lamborghini LM002 - but reliable. The X6 looks awful, though. It hasn't got a good angle, which is pretty hard to do, even if you're being deliberate. It seats four but has a small boot, and even though legroom is fine in the back, headroom is obviously compromised. I really wanted to like this car, sorry SAV. I love the way it drives and handles. Think that an X6 xDrive 35d would be a great thing to own if you never had to glance back when you parked it. You do, though. You have to look at your car. And for that reason, the X6 is destined to be the most successful failure I've ever tested.